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Doge to the Moon, EV-Mail, and Millennials Open Up

May 10th, 2021 | Sign Up

Good Morning and happy belated Mother’s Day to all of the 2.2 billion moms out there. If you bought your mom Dogecoin for Mother’s Day, shame on you. 

Price Update

⬇️  Bitcoin: $58,240 ( -1.06%)

⬆️ Ethereum: $4,105 ( +4.59%)

⬇️ Dogecoin: $0.57129 ( -10.34%)

⬇️  Chainlink: $51.36 ( -0.36%)

⬆️  SushiSwap: $16.29 ( +0.95%)

Prices as of 11 PM EST 11/9, data from FTX.com

Markets: Dogecoin tanks 30% during Elon Musk’s unsurprisingly awkward SNL appearance, while Ethereum breaks above $4 thousand for the first time and the total crypto market cap reaches $2.5 trillion.

Covid: Sri Lanka reports new record high covid cases in a day, with 2,569 cases on Monday. The island nation’s spike in cases comes amid a wave of new Covid-19 cases in south Asian countries, especially India.

Small Bitez


Doge to the Moon—Literally Though

If you thought the Dogecoin news couldn’t get more ridiculous and that you must be dreaming, we’re sorry to inform you that you are indeed awake. Unless you’re dreaming about reading Zoomer Money in which case, we’re flattered, but go ahead and pinch yourself. Things can still get a whole lot more more ridiculous. We can’t wait to see what tops this one.

While everyone was focusing on Elon Musk’s appearance on a show running on the fumes of its glory days, Elon’s company SpaceX announced its plans to launch a Dogecoin-funded satellite to the moon, called DOGE-1. Promise we’re not making this up.

SpaceX VP of Commercial Sales Tom Ochinero:

This mission will demonstrate the application of cryptocurrency beyond Earth orbit and set the foundation for interplanetary commerce.

The company says it plans to fly the satellite on a falcon 9 in the first quarter of 2021. And of course Elon tweeted about it. Unfortunately though, for Dogecoin hodlers, the meme coin tanked 30% on the day of the SNL episode.


USPS Electric Trucks Gain Steam

The cute electric mail trucks that were unveiled in late February have been the subject of political debate since it was announced that only 10% of the new fleet would actually be electric, with some Democrats calling for a freeze of the contract until an investigation into “inappropriate political influence” was conducted. Meanwhile, the current Grumman LLVs have been on the road for so long they are catching fire.

Now it looks like the push for a fully-electric mail fleet is finally underway. Biden’s crew hopes to plop down about $8 Billion, the full amount required to replace all of the old Grummans with EVs, including charging stations. That’s about $2 Billion more than the cost of the current plan, but the final amount will surely get shaved down in congress.

USPS hasn’t made a profit since 2006 and has made huge cuts to infrastructure to survive, which is the excuse postal leaders were giving to defend the cheaper move to new gas vehicles instead of 100% electric. Currently, USPS has made no official timeline commitment for a sustainable fleet, unlike competitors Amazon and FedEx. Your dog may soon have to bark at an Amazon drone mail carrier instead.



Our version of the crossword puzzle, but with emojis and uh, …no crossing.

  1. 🚀 + 🚗 + ⚽️ = ???

  2. 🦊 + 😷 + 📲 = ???

  3. 🧱⛓️ + 🧠 + 🤝 = ???


How Much Do Millennials Make? Don’t Worry, They’ll Tell You

Wait, this newsletter is called Zoomer Money, why are you talking about millennials?

Good question. In order to accurately analyze and report on the role of money in a Zoomer’s life, it’s important to understand the trends of previous generations to get a better picture of how money is evolving. Also—this newsletter is for everyone. If you’re reading this and you’re older (hi Mom!), you’re an honorary Zoomer, and we’d be happy to show you the world of next-gen finance.

The Wall Street Journal interviewed several random early 30’s millennials indicating a common theme that younger people see the benefits of being more open about finance than the generations before us.

The numbers

  • A 2019 survey by CreditCards.com found that 61% of millennials were comfortable discussing credit-card debt with their friends, compared with 43% of baby boomers. 

  • Swedish fintech company Klarna said a recent global survey found that 50% of millennials believe it is important to talk openly about finances, compared with 41% of older generations.

  • Millennials average yearly expenditures totals around $47,112. [Source: BLS]

  • Millennials’ average yearly income is around $56,099 before taxes. [Source: BLS]

  • 52 percent of millennials prefer to shop at retailers that align with their values. [Source: Euclid]

What about Zoomers?

There is not much concrete data on Zoomers yet, partly due to news outlets deciding that Generation Z doesn't exist, and lumping them in with millennials. With the fact that the oldest Zoomer is only 24, the data is cloudy. How will Zoomer’s change the world of finance as we know it? Do they even like avocado toast? Stay tuned 😇

Thanks for reading! 👋

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EmojiGram answers:

  1. Rocket League

  2. Metamask (App)

  3. (Blockchain) Smart Contract

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